Hope?

Who will I be?
What will I be?
I feel like my slate is pretty clean right now; I'm in such a new environment that my patterns haven't shown themselves yet. I don't feel real good about some stuff in my life, but I think having that tension is good. And, when I say stuff in my life, I don't mean behavioral, I mean actual, physical problems in my life... i.e. my car being junk (as of now), not getting paid a whole lot, not really having fellowship, feeling lonely etc. Of course, some of those things I can change, some I can't. Beyond that, I can fill these holes in my life with good things or bad things. Beyond THAT, I probably will make wrong decisions that will need to be changed later on.
When I stop to look at who I am right now, I can't answer. Am I a hard worker? Do I feel passionate about my job? Am I having faith in God as my car seems to get crappier and crappier by the day (slight exageration)? Am I using this seemingly slight valley in my life to lean on God (or on myself)?
I guess right now, I'm saying to myself, "It'll all work out, right?" As in, "God will make my life happy and comfortable, right?" I'm kinda realizing that what God wants is for His Glorious Kingdom to be advanced, for it to come to earth. I can certainly be trying my best to do that regardless of my personal situation. Will my life get 'better' any time soon? I hope so, but my life doesn't have to be going great for me to help advance God's kingdom.
I do have lots of blessings in my life right now. My housing is free and awesome; I have a car that runs, I'm not hungry, I have a job, I like my coworkers, my job is in the film industry, I got my job within three weeks of moving to LA, my family has been very supportive, etc.
It's really just since money came into play (when I purchased my car) that I've started realizing some sourness in my mouth. And that situation does suck, but my life certainly isn't over. Larger picture: I have a bizzillion chances a day to extend God's love to other people, and if I'm in a bad mood about little things, how many MORE of those will I miss?

Ok, here are some things I miss about KS:
1. the light traffic... I thought it was bad on 23rd street on Fridays... it takes me at least a half an hour, usually almost an hour, to get home from work... my office is literally 3 miles from my house.
2. knowing where things are... I don't really know how to get anywhere except by mapquest.
3. being able to drive at high rates of speed on highways at all times of day... again, the traffice causes a lot of stress. I was on a run today on a street called La Brea, and I seriously got stuck at every stop light for about 4 miles... took me 30 min to go 4 miles... and I attribute most of the slowness to the heavy traffic.
4. my friends and family... what an awesome network of support and encouragement they are... and I only get to communicate with them every so often out here in LA, 2 hours behind you all... so sad.

Ok, well, I hope to find out who I am in the coming months. I hope I'm a humble, hard worker who enjoys making people laugh. We'll see what I really am.
-C